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Fighting Fairly for A Lasting Marriage
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Respect Each Other : Key to Fighting Fairly
There comes a time when tensions reach their top level that any married couple cannot help but just let out their frustration on each other. Fights are generally inevitable. They seem to be something that has to be dealt with. However, if it starts to be serious, conscious efforts should be done to salvage a marriage.
Fights
Sick and tired of constant bickering and fighting? It is actually such a wonder why other people just cannot help but fight.
Fights take place because of failure to compromise, arrive at a consensus or even to have a simple understanding of a situation. They are often triggered by fears, threatened feelings or insecurities.
They usually result to constant disagreement, bickering, verbal exchange of angry words, and unfortunately, it gets physical in some cases.
The After Effects
Recall. In the instances that a couple would fight, what are the effects after? No one actually wins in any argument. The confrontations can be very exhausting. The disagreements create too much tension. Rarely would one feel good after a fight.
How to Avoid Fights
Being part of the reality of being in a marriage relationship, there should be active effort to avoid fights. If they cannot be avoided, there are ways of minimizing their bad effects or to at least arrive at a helpful resolution. Fight fairly. Here are some ways:
1. Know one another. Know what upsets the other. Part of love and respect for your partner is to avoid insinuating things that would upset the other.
2. Do not be obsessed with being in control.
3. Maintain some space. Sometimes fights result because the husband and the wife are already in each other’s “hair”. Once one or the other is feeling the tension rise, it may be best to cool down away from one another with mutual respect.
4. Even if some time apart is desirable, it should be kept in mind that communication must be maintained. Once the spouses have both “cooled down”, the problem should be discussed and resolved.
5. Big fights usually are started from small misunderstandings. It is essential that each party be able to discuss with the other any matter which he or she finds troubling no matter how trivial it may seem.
Current statistics indicate that there are at least 25 million people in the United States alone who have been divorced. Do not be part of this sad statistic. The key to a lasting marriage is to maintain an open communication. Respect each other. Be sensitive to the needs, strengths and weaknesses of each other. With these foundations, the couple will weather any storm.
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04-28-2007, 12:37 PM
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